Seriously. I’m not even joking. All. By. My. Self. No stroller to push. No running, skipping, racing, galloping boys to herd. No skinned knees to tend to. No unborn child in my belly. No lingering C-section incision pain. I went for a walk and it was amazing.
The night was beautiful-- not humid like many Virginia summer nights-- and I could actually walk quickly in the twilight as Reston went to sleep. The cicadas didn't even sound creepy, but they were far enough away that they sounded, dare I say it, almost charming. Halfway through the walk, which had no direction, I was simply walking to walk and escape the loud, inside day, I decided I deserved some Trader Joe’s chocolate. My walk suddenly had direction. There is no chocolate like Trader Joe’s chocolate, and maybe my mouth started watering a little. I rounded a corner to the store only to see a virtually empty parking lot. It was 9:09pm. Who knew they closed at 9pm? I guess I’m spoiled with the 24 hour supermarket by our house. Shut down. I peered inside hopelessly at the stupid happy workers getting ready to leave.
I took it as a sign that I didn’t really need chocolate and maybe deserving chocolate isn’t even a thing. I certainly don’t need chocolate and it would just be depressing to buy some other un-Trader Joe’s chocolate, even though there were other chocolate-buying options closeby. So then I walked all the way home feeling free and mentally strong. I had faced temptation and…well, been ruthlessly shut down, but also refused to buy other chocolate just to buy chocolate.
When I got home I nursed Teddy, and called it a night. Okay, and maybe I ate a few chocolate chips first.