Since my last blog entry was about poop I thought I could follow with a short one about a comment made to me today by an old man about the anatomical parts of boys. My boys, specifically. Which, by the way, this 60-something year-old dude called “pee-pees.” That’s right.
I was standing in line at the coffee shop by my house, with the boys and the double-wide stroller, (the duplex) minding my own business, absently scanning the pastries and organic this and that for sale. Another old gentleman, with more tact than the second one, said to the boys jokingly, “no coffee for you too,” which was cute and fine and disappeared into the soft music.
Then after I had ordered, the old man who is the subject of this anecdote cupped his hand and said softly to me, “Good for you for bringing an extra pee-pee into the world.” Hehe, I chuckled back, before I could completely process what he said. And then he was gone. Really? Who says that? I replayed it in my mind to make sure that was what he said. I still wonder if I am correct in my recollection, but I’m pretty certain I am. It doesn’t sound like anything else.
After he had left I thought up some witty comebacks, which is usually what happens to me after the moment has passed. “Yeah, it was my lifelong goal, two pee-pees.” “Yep, replacing yours and then some.” And I’ll pretend like there were others.
Not that I would ever say that to him. I’m not very daring in such situations.
Anyway, that was the funny quote of the day. The second funniest was when I asked Cal if he wanted juice this morning and he answered, “Juice me.” I take that back. That was probably funnier than the pee-pee comment.
That man has no idea how fortunate he was that I wasn't there. For in order to keep the karmic balance of the coffee shop (to say nothing of the planet...), I would have been compelled to ask his name and maintain a morbid vigil of the obituary section in the paper. Upon his death, I would have then appeared at his funeral and in keeping with the inappropriate theme he started I'd have said the following..."Ladies and gentleman...pardon me, I did not know Mr. (insert name here). I simply wish to honor his memory by reminding all of you that there is now one less, AND I QUOTE Mr. (insert name here) directly...pee-pee in the world."
ReplyDeleteHa! Nice, Rob. I don't know why, but I'm just seeing your comment now for the first time. I still can't believe that guy said that. Funny.
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