The Carrot Who Wanted to be Eaten
Once upon a time there was a lonely carrot who wanted to be eaten in the middle. He asked a person,” Will you bite me in the middle?” The person said, “I have my own carrots at home.” Another person said, "I don’t have carrots at home. We were thinking of going to Costco to get some, but we didn’t, so I can bite you in the middle." So he tried to eat him in the middle but it didn’t work. Then a lady said the same thing- she didn’t have carrots at home either. She said, “I’ll bite you on the end and then eat up and up.” “No!” the carrot yelled out. Then he sat on the plate and turned into a real carrot who couldn’t talk and they all ate him. The end.
The Ranch Dressing Gets Mad
Once upon a time there was Ranch Dressing. A penguin came up and said, “I want to eat all the Ranch dressing.” Ranch Dressing yelled, “No! Don’t eat me all!” And then a carrot came up and said, I want to eat you all.” And Ranch Dressing said, “No! Don’t eat me, just like the penguin.” Another penguin came up and said, “You don’t look good. I’m just going to eat the tree instead.” “Yes! said Ranch Dressing, “that’s good for me.” Then a big humongous excavator came and said, “I want to eat everything in the whole world, but not you.” “That’s good too,” said Ranch Dressing. Then a computer came up and said, “I want to come up and eat those little seeds.” No, said Ranch Dressing. “That’s a little part of the dressing too.” And then they talked a little more and someone said, you know what, we want to switch.” That was the hummus. Then a water bottle came up and said, “Don’t worry, the Gatorade is on his way now.” Then the Gatorade got there and said to Ranch Dressing, "Do you want to drink me? It's fine." Another hummus came up and said to Ranch Dressing, "Tomatoes are in me. Do you like tomatoes?" "Yes, said Ranch Dressing. And he wasn't mad. The end.
|Calvin the author, illustrating his story-- this one|
about a beard and a hand turkey