The Tale of Lumpy Tree: A Love Story

We threw away my old fake tree after last Christmas. It had seen many better days and we thought that by this Christmas the boys would enjoy going out to an actual tree farm and picking out a tree. So we went. We went to Joe's Trees in Loudon County. The boys loved running around, squealing about all the trees, pointing out all the "sad Christmas stumps" from the trees that had already been cut down. Brian was completely ambivalent about tree choice. He told me, "Pick whatever you want because I don't care at all." Well, he didn't care at all until he saw Lumpy Tree. He was then convinced that this was the tree we needed more than anything.
 
Lumpy Tree can be described in a number of ways, but even pictures and words don't do it justice. To give you a rough idea, it looks like:
 

·         A hairball that a large pine tree puked out, that then grew a stump and stuck around

·         Two trees that fell in love, started growing together as one and then got in a giant fight but couldn't quite separate again

·         Twin trees, where one was always bigger and stronger and eventually ate the smaller one

·         A tree that grew close to a nuclear facility

 

I mean, this thing is a pile. But Brian fell in love and soon the boys were also boisterously declaring their love of Lumpy Tree. It was the only tree they ever wanted to bring home. It was so beautiful and lumpy! It was a great as a cow! (This was Cal's phrase, and I'm not quite sure I follow it...) Lumpy Tree was so excited to see our house! They couldn't believe how cute Lumpy Tree was!
 
I could not believe that I was being pressured to put this coniferous pile of green in my living room. But what was I supposed to do? Be a bratty suburban wife with a perfect triangle tree when my boys all want a less-than-desirable one?
 
So I gave the go-ahead and Brian sawed it down. The guys who run the farm laughed hysterically and asked if we were kidding when we came dragging the tree over toward our car. They said they knew no one would want that one and they weren't sure what they were going to do with it. "This is one happy tree tonight!" one of the guys said. Cute.
 
All the way home the boys were talking about how much they love their new friend Lumpy Tree, and what would Lumpy Tree say about our house? Would he like it? It did feel kind of cool and generous to be taking a tree that no one else wanted and decorating it in our house. I’ll admit that.
 
The boys woke up super-stoked to decorate the tree. And I mean, bouncing-off-the-walls stoked. We did it and they were exuberant about it the entire time. This was a huge switch from the past seven or eight years, where I usually quietly and sentimentally do it by myself while listening to soft Christmas music late at night. Every ornament had its place. Big difference this morning. A couple ornaments were broken, and they were way unequally distributed. The boys are even more deeply in love with our beautiful Lumpy Tree now that it is covered in lights and ornaments. When we walk in the door, they immediately remind us we need to turn Lumpy Tree’s lights on. It now looks like Christmas threw up in our living room.
 
However, I’ll admit that even though he’s only been here for 24 hours, I’ve become kind of fond of our Lumpy Tree. And if we got a respectable, triangle tree, there would be no reason to write a blog entry about it.

Click here to find out about the other surprise we got from Lumpy Tree.
 


So many trees to run in between!

Perfectly respectable tree

 

Clark found the perfect tree for our Baby Peapod!

 

Yep. Meet Lumpy Tree.

Lumpy Tree, meet our house.

This. Just. Happened.

Weird, protruding branch in prominant location

Unbridled decorating enthusiasm-- doesn't even need
pants on for it.

What a pile of beauty

Oh, Lumpy Tree.

Weird exposure shot

 

Thursday Thesicle

 

Eating melted chocolate is hard work, but someone's got to do it.

 

Our Wives Are So Worried About Us

About a month ago, we stumbled upon the movie Apollo 13 on TV. Since the boys have been enthralled with space over the past year or so, Brian kept it on and explained the situation to them—and explained that those were not the real astronauts, but actors pretending to be the real astronauts. Then they looked at pictures online of the real astronauts. It got to be late. We put the boys’ pajamas on and let them keep watching the movie. Clark fell asleep on the couch. Cal sat, glued to the movie, until it was over and we plopped them both in bed.

When they woke up it was all they wanted to talk about. I bet you can guess the boys’ favorite story to reenact now. The Gruffalo has taken a backseat to Apollo 13 Astronauts. Their favorite place to play it is on the metro. Which is good for practical reasons—they’re engaged and entertained for the entire ride, but like it or not, so is everyone else around them. We were out on the metro three times in the past two weeks, and many metro riders have now been exposed to the boys’ imaginations while trapped in a small space with them.

The awkward part is that the boys reference their wives at home who are so worried about them, the Apollo 13 astronauts. Loudly. Loudly, these three year-olds inform the whole train car that they have wives at home who are worried. What can I say? There's nothing I can say to make that not weird.

They both address each other each time they talk as “Hey Apollo 13 astronaut…” and they also call me by the same name. I mean, there were three astronauts in Apollo 13, so it’s perfect. So, as we are rumbling along on the train, all the stone-faced commuters staring out the window or in their newspaper, Clark usually starts everything off by loudly proclaiming, “Houston, we have a problem.”

Then they go on to talk to each other (and everyone because they don’t know how to talk quietly) about the explosion in the oxygen tank, and how brave they are being as they figure out how to get home safely. “We’ve lost the moon,” Cal will somberly tell us. Then we will discuss how there are so many scientists and engineers on Earth who are helping us figure out how to get home. Occasionally, one of the boys will scream and point out the window, “There’s Saturn!” which startles most people, but not me anymore. This will start off a series of exuberant planet-sightings out the windows. “Jupiter! Neptune! There’s Mercury! That’s my favorite planet!”

The best part happens on our way home from downtown. We come out from underground a few stops before ours. As soon as we go from being in the dark tunnels to being in the light of day they start loudly clapping and woo-hooing. Apollo 13 landed! The people are so happy! Everybody is hugging! This usually gets quite a few grins and chuckles from passengers. When we get off at our stop they clap again and hug. “Our wives are so happy to have us home!”

And I hold their hands and walk my Apollo 13 astronauts to the elevator space ship, where they start a countdown to liftoff to the moon.

Everybody is so happy to see the Apollo 13 astronauts!

PLAY WORK BUILD

Last week we spent time at the new exhibit for kids and families at the National Building Museum. It's called PLAY WORK BUILD. There are several small display boxes of tiny block structures, some of them old building blocks of cities and towns, but the bulk of the exhibit is a hands-on celebration of blocks, and building. There are the familiar Lincoln Logs and Tinker Toys, but most of the blocks are made of bright blue foam in different shapes and sizes, including tubes. There is a big light table for building the smaller blocks, and a huge padded area for the bigger blocks in the exact same shapes as the small ones. You can even build into the wall itself.

The last part of the exhibit is an interactive screen. As kids move in front of sensors, their outlines are projected onto the wall. When they stop, virtual blocks form the shape that their body is in. They can also run straight at a virtual wall of blocks and their motion will knock the blocks over. It's completely amazing to me.

The boys absolutely loved the exhibit. I'm sure their tummies had to have been rumbling by the end, but they still did not want to leave, and neither did the girls we came with. Too bad my boys have a pregnant mom who has to eat something every hour or she'll pass out.

This was a big hit with my three year-olds. If you make the trip, which I highly recommend, plan to spend a couple hours there.

The only thing I wish was included in the exhibit is patterns for various structures. You can tell that there are so many possibilities out there for what can be built with these great shapes, but I think laminated patterns for bridges and stadiums and robots would add a whole new level of fun and learning. Maybe I'm just not creative enough. There were some pictures of structures people had made in the past, but it was pretty hard to tell exactly how they were built.

For more information about the concept and vision for the exhibit, read this.

PLAY WORK BUILD gets 5 SHOUTS from me!

Clark's "Nats Park"



Cal works on building his train.

The kids' "castle"  

A leaping castle guard

Clark, setting up his "football" to launch through his "goal posts"

Peek-a-blue!

Clark interacting with the giant screen

A block so big you can sit inside it? Yes, please!

Thursday Thesicle

At first, a little sibling looks pretty funny.

 

Playing With Their Chuthers

The boys enjoy playing with their chuthers. I know that doesn't meet anything to you, but they say "their chuthers" instead of "each other." It is adorable. I should probably put an end to the misunderstanding they have, but it's hard. I am usually delighted when they yell at me to, "Mom, watch the two birds! They're hugging their chuthers in their nest!" and I turn to see the boys hugging in a giant pile of blankets. Who would want that to end? Not me. Not yet anyway.

Snuggling with their chuthers

In their imaginations with their chuthers

Space-walking with their chuthers

Playing under the rug with their chuthers

Playing dress-up with their chuthers

Eating spaghetti with their chuthers

Climbing a fence with their chuthers

Feeding cows with their chuthers

Laughing and sliding with their chuthers

A Belated Thanks

I've been slacking here on the blog front. Last year during Thanksgiving week I asked the boys every day what they were thankful for and their answers were amusing and cute. This Thanksgiving week we spent much of the time making our turkey placemats, which turned out great, despite way too many trips to Office Depot. We used them at our Thursday Thanksgiving dinner, our Friday Thanksgiving dinner, and I sent some to my parents and grandparents for their dinner. On Thanksgiving day I did manage to write down some of the things the boys said they were thankful for. Here they are, though I'm warning you that they were not in very serious moods when I asked them.

Clark:

I'm thankful for teeth. I like them.
I'm thankful for funny things that make me go into space.
I'm thankful for you, Mom.
Pizza.
Crayons

Cal:

I'm thankful for toilet paper.
I'm thankful for computers.
I love books.

On Thursday we spent the day with Brian's relatives at his parents' house here. It is so nice to have them close to us! We had a yummy dinner and good backyard cousin playtime. The Redskins even won. Weird. Then Black Friday morning we drove down a traffic-less I-95 to my aunt and uncle's house in Richmond for our traditional second Thanksgiving dinner with them, my brother and his girlfriend and my cousin. Delicious. Saturday we spent most of the day at the Children's Museum of Richmond, which I strongly urge everyone with kids to visit. It's a great place at a bargain price. (Here is my review.) For kids who love to pretend, like ours do, you can't beat it.

It's been a nice Thanksgiving season. I am thankful for everything in my life, with the exception of that sink full of dishes and the less than clean kitchen floor.

Classic Clark Surprised Face- in the Richmond garden

Now where did that head go?

Waitin' for turkey with Uncle A

Making orange chocolate chip breakfast scones

Riding a dinosaur at the museum

Playing store with Aunt Anne

First-ever carousel ride! No idea why Clark wanted to ride the freakish bunny.

Dressing up in the theater

My little thespian

Putting on a puppet show. Spoiler: after the lion eats the bear,
the bear somehow comes back and eats the lion.

Art room!

Goofy grocery store employees

What I Found at the Holiday Bazaar

I remember going to Christmas-y craft fairs with my mom when I was little, and it had been years since I'd been to anything like one of those small town craft fairs. So beautiful. So exciting. So cheesy. So unbelievable what people will try to sell. There's something about going to craft fairs that just makes me want to hug a rosy-cheeked grandma. And maybe hope that she's wearing a holiday scene cross-stitch on her sweater.

Last weekend I went to the the Joyful Noise Holiday Bazaar in Sterling. It was much classier than the craft fairs I remember from growing up. Maybe it was that I didn't have to be selling teasel trees (Yes, that's a thing, and yes I made a bunch of them. Also, they were beautiful.).

There was a kids' craft table at the bazaar, which is where my discovery of the Thanksgiving season was made. They were making placemats-- real simple, with pieces of printer paper deocrated by themed borders. One of the girls helping at the craft table had decorated one with a handprint as a turkey. After that, they popped them in laminating pouches (What?! I've been out of teaching too long!) So, the boys made those, and they were so cute, and so easy that I decided that we would make them for all of our family members for our two different Thanksgiving dinners we will be a part of this year. Then I decided I would make them for my parents and grandparents and mail them to Idaho.

This was perhaps an ambitious goal, but the boys, especially Cal, are so interested in coloring and in doing art, that they have had a blast doing all these. Which is good because we still have a bunch to go. I'm hoping that the placemats will survive this year and live for more Thanksgiving dinners down the road.

Craft fairs and bazaars are fabulous for getting ideas! Maybe some of you can use this idea too.

Calvin's turkey placemat from the bazaar

Hard at work: they're personalizing the backs of the placemats too.

Cal insisted on doing his own handprint on all his turkeys.

Though this looks like suicidal jellyfish on the back of one placemat,
 Cal tells me it's actually George Washington,
Abe Lincoln, Thomas Jefferson,
and Teddy Roosevelt.



We used little spronge brushes to decorate the edges with paint.

Gammy's 9-legged mutant turkey isn't Cal's finest work...but I'm pretty
sure Gammy will love it. And he did it all by himself.

Now I need to go laminate them all...